You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
