Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
