What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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