I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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