she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
