i don't like sucking hair
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
