I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
