My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
