weddingsv make me drug and hornr
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
