i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
