A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
