you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
well, you know. whores of a feather.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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