Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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