Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
