I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize