new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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