When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Church boner. Awkwardddd
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
