Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
