Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
