Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I need a beard to bite.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
