So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
