she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
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