Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize