OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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