I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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