You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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