You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize