I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
