I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize