At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
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