do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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