He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
