I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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