Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
