Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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