I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
