i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
