So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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