he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
