The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
