Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
