im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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