i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
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