Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize