Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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