Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
