My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
