I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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