Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
