I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Drunk is a universal language darling
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
