k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
