even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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